Finding Space Inside
Often anxiety shows up as a feeling of being overwhelmed by crowded thoughts. Worries about the future and memories of the past seem to vie for space in a much-too-little-feeling mind. The body becomes tense and emotions feel overwhelming.
When this experience is chronic it can feel as though it will never go away. Yet, it is possible to feel space inside. Check in now. Feel, is there a part of you that feels a glimmer of that possibility? Here are a few things that can help quiet anxiety and create some space:
Clean something. Our inner and outer worlds reflect one another. Notice if there’s a way you want to rearrange the space around you. Pick up the room, or deep clean a cupboard. See what happens to your internal experience.
Go somewhere open. Find a place where you can look at the sky or the water. Open your senses, including the feeling of your relationship to gravity. Invite your mind and body to reflect that sense of openness.
Move your body. Thoughts, moods and inner rhythms and patterns are influenced by our bodies (and vice versa). If you are noticing that there is cramping and tightness in your thoughts, you might be able to work some of that through your body. Start by standing up and feeling your feet. Notice if there’s anything that needs moving. You might stretch up, fold forward or bounce lightly on your feet. Follow what naturally happens for a bit. You might wind up stretching for a while, moving in other ways, or doing something else that brings you peace. Just try to follow what you’re doing, “tracking” inside for any sense of space.
Breathe. Start by bringing awareness to how you are breathing, without any intention to change it. Instead, pay attention to any natural shifts. Often just noticing tight, shallow or small breath will change it. As your breath loosens, gently begin to deepen it. This might be enough. Stay here and track any calming or slowing down. If you want, turn your attention in (it can help to close your eyes) and pay attention to what parts of your body move when you breathe. You can also imagine your breath traveling into places of tightness, both in the quality of your thoughts and in your body.
Draw. Drawing is another way to access and then ease out tension. For many, it is initially uncomfortable to draw. Most (if not all) of us drew as children, and many of us stopped drawing years ago. Drawing can also carry experiences of judgment or criticism. It can be helpful to focus on the process, not the resulting drawing. I’ve found it useful to consider the drawing a sort of byproduct of the process. The byproduct is often striking or beautiful, but it does not need to be. Start by choosing materials you’re comfortable with. A pen and notebook work great, or use crayons, markers or pastels. Start off scribbling, just noticing what it feels like to move your hand. See if you naturally slow down, speed-up, tighten or loosen the scribbles. If you get the urge to draw something else, follow it. When you’re done, check in. Again, track and see if there’s a sense of space after the practice.
Exercise. Expend some energy. Hiking, jogging, biking and swimming are all good ways to get the heart and breath going. Exercise regulates the nervous system. A regulated nervous system creates the experience of safety and calm, that is, space.
What else? Remember that glimmer of possibility? Follow the thing inside you that knows how to make space inside. See what happens. Make your own list. See what works, see what doesn’t, and find a way to reflect on the process.
Making space is a practice. Like any practice, is develops and deepens over time. Things may not get noticeably better, especially not right away. You may not feel hopeful, not yet. It is hard to be present and patient when there is pain. Be gentle with yourself, and find ways to get support for your process. And when it does feel smooth, take in any changes that happen, and enjoy the space as it grows.